CLARKSON ANNOUNCES TO HAVE JOHN WILKES BOOTH’S BONES AS COMMENCEMENT SPEAKER

  • CLARKSON ANNOUNCES TO HAVE JOHN WILKES BOOTH’S BONES AS COMMENCEMENT SPEAKER IN RESPONSE TO SLU HAVING ABRAHAM LINCOLN’S BONES AS THEIR SPEAKER

In a shocking turn of events, Clarkson University President Tony Collins posted a selfie with John Wilkes Booth’s bones, caption:

“Glad to have my old friend, John as the commencement speaker this year. He’ll definitely kill it, if you know what I mean. #BEATSLU #UMad? #WilkesBooth.”

This comes in response to SLU President’s Selfie with Abraham Lincoln’s bones. President Fox’s Caption read:

“Glad to have history’s best, hat-wearing president at commencement this year.”

It is rumored that a restraining order has been administered on Mr. Booth’s bones with extra security, -in order to keep the once great President’s bones safe from any further violence. Mr. Booth’s bones had no comment on this matter.

The next question we should be asking is what will Mr. Booth’s bones be doing after commencement. Will he stay for the after party or will he have to go back to bone-jail?

We will fill you in with more details, as we get closer to this historic event…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *